Birthday Party Countdown = Insanity

Remember a month ago I mentioned a fun family visit to the doctor’s office where we all got sticks jammed down our throats? It’s called a Strep Test but really it’s more like medieval torture. Turned out Bunky was the only one who had strep, poor kid, and somehow she has it AGAIN. Evil preschool germs.

Well, this time we skipped the family stick up, but poor B was freaking out all morning crying, “No stick, tell them no stick!” which I totally understand. That shit is messed up. My husband tried to reason with her, saying maybe they wouldn’t need to do the test, which I thought was false advertising, but it kept her quite (for about fifteen seconds) so I didn’t argue. But luck was on our side because we met with a new nurse practitioner who I heard was awesome, and turns out the rumors were true because after examining my poor sick kid she agreed NO STICK. I call it an early birthday present because Bunky’s turning 5 in less than a week.

Holy Crap! Her birthday is April 28 and we’re having a teeny weenie party this coming Saturday and now I have a sick kid missing two days of school, so needless to say I’m freaking out. Just a little. I have a shit ton to do in order not to have a complete fail (see Easter) so I’m hoping my baby sitter doesn’t cancel because otherwise no one is getting any allergy free cake.  Which would be sad, really, since it is a birthday party.

Not only am I baking a gluten free cake (duh) but also a nut free and egg free one, because one of Bunky’s best girlfriends from school has nut and egg allergies. [Unfortunately, due to B’s need for a small crowd and space constraints, we could only invite 5 kids, so we ended up going with only girls to be “fair” even though I love the boys in her class.] The egg free part feels tricky to me because I’m not used to it, but the chocolate thing is complicated, too, since much of it is often made in facilities with nuts. I am taking this task very seriously since I obviously don’t want anyone having a life threatening allergic attack on my watch.

So this cake is out.

But man, isn’t it so pretty? I have to admit, after spotting this sucker on Pinterest, I considered making it even though I don’t have a cake pop pan (that’s how they made the polka dots). I figured I could use a mini muffin tin, but then I came to my senses.

In the end, Bunky told me what kind of cupcake she wanted – chocolate on chocolate – not surprising as she is a total chocoholic. Then out of nowhere she told me she wanted roses on top. Sure, cool, no problem, I said. My husband looked impressed – as if I was going to bust out a cake decorator and pipe those suckers on top. No way! It’s called sugar roses, dude, and I planned on finding them at a grocery store until we stopped by a Michael’s craft store near my dad’s house in New Jersey. They had all kinds of fancy cupcake decorations, including pink daisies and purple princess crowns, but Bunky held strong to her red rose dream. Gluten free, yeah, but filled with all kinds of chemicals and color dye. No beaver butt, though.

So the chocolate cake is currently my wild card. All my tried and true gluten free chocolate cake recipes call for at least 3 eggs which seems a bit much in terms of using egg replacer. When I did a search online for gluten and egg free (and nut free, but if I use Better Batter flour and safe chocolate I should be okay), almost every recipe also happened to be dairy free, which kind of annoyed me. No offense to the DF-ers out there, but my kid and her friend can actually eat dairy, so I want to include butter and milk in my cake if I can. I mean, my kid loves butter. She’d eat a stick if I let her. Gross, but true.

I found a few recipes that look promising – one, two, three to be exact – but if you know me, you know I don’t like to waste time (because I have no time) so I’m kind of hesitant to try out someone’s random cake recipe without some serious recommendations. In the end I’m going with either a Cybele Pascal recipe (and use regular milk instead of rice, but no butter, sigh) or Annalise Roberts‘ Chocolate Fudge cake (using egg replacer for 2 eggs, but still no butter!!) that came highly recommended. If anyone has tried either of these ladies’ cakes and wants to chime in, PLEASE DO.

I know in the end I could just go with a Cherrybrook Kitchens allergy free mix, but to be honest, while I’m grateful to have that option in a pinch (and may end up making a batch of those for the adults, ha) it just doesn’t taste that great. I think when you take out EVERYTHING potentially allergenic and throw it into a box mix, you can’t expect much. I want my kid’s birthday cupcakes to be awesome. I want her to eat the ENTIRE THING and not just lick off the cheap-o Betty Crocker frosting (yeah, I thought about making my own but then came to my senses, again).

Wish me luck. I only have 4 more days left…